FCCS News & Insights

The Art of Communication Without Coercion

Insights from Pamela Barnum, Trust Strategist & Nonverbal Communication Expert

Effective communication is an essential leadership skill, encompassing not only the words that are spoken but the non-verbal messages that are conveyed unconsciously. Experts estimate that non-verbal cues account for up to 93% of what we communicate, making things like tone of voice, cadence and body language important considerations during any conversation.

Non-verbal communications techniques can help establish and build trust – people make decisions about others within 1/10th of a second, based almost entirely on non-verbal cues. Good practice is to employ the “SOME” tactics – Smile, employ Open body language, Mirror the other person’s positions and maintain Eye contact.

Leaders can get caught up in doing things the way they’ve always been done, and this can carry into communication as well. Instead, effective leaders ask their team members what kind of communication serves them best, and then use each encounter as a unique opportunity for connection. Strong communicators also employ active listening, asking open-ended questions following the “DID” formula: Discovery questions to define the “what” of the conversation or issue, Implementation questions to understand the “how,” and Disclosure questions to ascertain the “why” of both parties’ wants and needs in order to find common ground.

It’s essential as a leader to demonstrate confidence, empathy and humility, especially when communicating during conflict. At those times, leaders need to be willing to slow down the conversation to de-escalate the heightened tension, including taking a break from communicating about the conflict for time to consider the others’ perspectives.

Another effective conversational tool is priming, through which a leader can set the stage for positive communication by first reminding their team member of previous successes. To this end, it’s helpful to keep a journal of successes to recall the times that they – and you – got it right.

Hear more from Pamela Barnum on Episode 57 of The Forward Thinking Podcast, powered by FCCS.